Coping with Rejection in Relationships

Everyone has faced rejection and cold shouldering at some point in their life,from someone they care for. It does hurt when we have to deal with such situations. But, how do we come out of it? How do we steer ourselves towards a better state of mind?

Rejections happen in all kinds of Relationships.

It is not that rejection happens only in romantic relationships.

  • There are friends who stop talking with you
  • Office buddies who stop supporting you
  • Close relations and Family members who start behaving indifferently to you
  • Even acquaintances who stop greeting you

The list is endless.

As the saying goes-‘Love ends when you stop caring and friendship stops when you stop sharing’

Why do people reject you?

I am sure every person who has gone through a rejection,asks the question to themselves. Why is my friend not talking to me? Why did my relative not invite me to his son’s wedding?.

Reasons can be numerous.

In romantic relationships,rejections are more hurting than in any other relationship.There are various social,cultural and even economic reasons why a person rejects a marriage proposal,especially in a country like India.A mismatch in any sphere makes the other party think that the alliance will not work.Even if there is no mismatch,there is every possibility that the other person is just not interested.Though it is hard to accept,it is the truth.It could be that the other person is just not in a state of mind to see the good in you.If that is the case,accept it and move forward.

 

In friendships,it could be that a small misunderstanding has grown into gigantic proportions and blocked the good feelings your friend had for you.Else,it could be that they have become busy in their lives and just do not have the time to think about you.New events and new friends have taken over your place.

Coworkers stop supporting you due to obvious reasons,especially in a corporate environment,where there is cut-throat competition.

Of course,there are times when there are no valid reasons for rejection.It is just that other person is not being nice and thinks too much of himself or herself.Such friends or lovers do not deserve you and it is best to get rid of them sooner.

How to cope up with such rejections?

1.Avoid Negative Feelings-Rejection makes you feel depressed. You are left feeling worthless. There is a tendency to develop anger,hatred,even jealousy towards the person who rejected you. Do not get into revenge mentality.

2.Don’t lose your self worth-Don’t let a feeling of worthlessness creep into your mind. If the other person cant see your worth,it is their problem,not yours. You should always be the best-at least in your eyes.Don’t bend backwards to get acceptance from others.

3.Divert your thoughts-Each time you think about the friend who is ignoring you or the relative who doesn’t care for you,you are bringing yourself more misery. Channel your thoughts into more soothing activities. Never brood over what has already happened.

4.Engage in Interesting Activities-When God closes a window,he opens a door. Think of any activity that will brighten you up. It could be anything like shopping,gardening,reading,singing…whatever. Immerse yourself in your passion. Better still,take up something for the first time. The high that a well done activity gives is immeasurable. It drowns any other disappointments that might have been there before.

5.Count your blessings-Make a list of people who have made you feel special. Think of the school friend who called you all of a sudden to say hi! Think of your relative who insisted you attend the function in their house! Think of your immediate family members who have showered affection on you! Think of a co-worker who told you that you were a great colleague! Think of your college junior who told you that you are her role model!

Yes,for every one person who doesn’t care about you,there are numerous people out there,who think the world of you.

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